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Daft Daniel MP

January 2009


The tallest MP ever Daniel Kawczynski is building a formidable record of being the daftest MP ever. His ersatz rage against the police’s visit to his office is only the latest in a series of episodes of odd behaviour.

The Speaker refused him permission to bring a cow onto the House of Commons estate.

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This cow would have been used to advertise the threat posed to farming by bovine tuberculosis.  Presumably on its flanks would be the message “Gas All Badgers Now”. He raged then about this restriction of his liberty.

He is almost alone in wanting a new bank holiday to celebrate the Polish presence in Britain. He raged against John Humphrys and the Beeb the Today programme with this glorious mixed metaphor, saying the BBC is using the Poles as “a cat's paw to try to tackle the thorny issue of mass, unchecked immigration into our country”. There had been an increase in violence towards Poles and he was "convinced this is as a result of the media coverage by the BBC".

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His prime role in the Commons is as the mouthpiece of the farmers' unions.

However greedy, inane or self-serving their press releases are Daft Dan will obediently reproduce them as Early Day Motions. He challenged a plea that taxpayers should not continue to shell £billions in handouts to farmers for eternity.

His EDM started:

That this House notes with concern the Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs' recent comments that subsidy for farmers should be removed by 2020... drivel, ...drivel…

I decided to exocet it with an amendment. Every time an MP signs Kawczynski's motion my amendment will be printed, hopefully deadening its effect.

Add `applauds the practical courageous attempt by the Secretary of State forCorn_with_dollars the Environment to lead the farming industry out of its victim dependency culture; believes that taxpayers should not be forced to pay a farm tax of subsidies, support and free insurance of £700 annually by every average family, especially now that single payments are hand-outs for owning land rather than producing food; recalls that the minor relevance of British meat farmers was demonstrated when British meat production ceased for six months during the foot and mouth outbreak, creating no shortages of meat or increases in supermarket prices; notes the misuse of taxpayers' money as state charity and income support for millionaires including, between 2002 and 2004, sums of £2.2 million to Sir Richard Sutton, £1.5 million to the Vestey family, £2.5 million to Alan Turner, £900,000 each to the Duke of Radnor, the Earl of Plymouth and the Duke of Richmond, £799,000 to the Duke of Westminster and £300,000 to the Duchy of Cornwall'.

Daniel is a politician to watch. Amazingly his bizarre behaviour was defended on Radio Wales this week by semi-sensible Welsh Tory MP Stephen Crabb.

Curiouser and curiouser.